Tired of Pretending

She may seem so perfect but behind it all..shes just an accident waiting to happen

This is where the hurting starts & the nightmare begins.

The girl who always looks sad but claims she’s fine.
The girl who puts sad away messages up everyday.
The girl who when she sees you, smiles a half a smile.
The girl who always has time to listen to you vent and is willing to give her opinion to help you in anyway that she can.
The girl who cares about helping everyone but herself.
The girl who cries every night before she goes to sleep.
The girl who pretends that she’s okay while she's dying inside.
The girl who says she’s happy for you when you get a new girlfriend while jealousy is raging inside her.
The girl who hugs you when you’re down but secretly wishes she could hug you forever.
The girl who tries to look beautiful even though she knows she’s not.
The girl who says that she’ll always be there for you & means it.
That’s me that is the story of my life

You should know by now that when i smile and say "yeah, i'm fine" it's really code for "no i'm not okay and i feel like my world is crashing down around me"
Yet she still sits there smiling;;
Regardless of all the fake friends.
&& the dreams that were broken.
Regardless of the guys she loved
And the hearts that were broken.

I know how it feels
To sit on the edge of your bed
Head in your hands
Wishing it would all just end...

Grave digger, when you dig my grave.. Will you make it shallow, so that i can feel the rain

Not even make up could make her
Beautiful... Because real beauty
Comes from loving yourself and
That's something she can never do

I dream of giving birth to a child who will ask "mommy, what was war?"

She's just the typical teenage girl..
Angry, insecure, confused.
I'd tell her that things will be okay..
But i don't want to [ lie ] to her

See, when her away message says not to im her because she’s sad or depressed, the only thing she wants at that moment is for you to im her

All she wants to be is beautiful..

She`s gorgeous. She`s beautiful. She stares in the mirror
And hates what she sees. She spends hours in the morning
Fixing her hair, putting on make-up, && still hating her
Reflection. She exercises five hours a day, starves herself
Skinny, makes herself throw up at night. She goes in
Depression. Starts cutting herself. She spends thousands to
Go under the knife to change the beauty she already had.
She`s beautiful. Anyone can see it; except her. Why can`t
She just learn to love herself instead of putting herself
Through all this agony? She`s never good enough for
Herself. Doesn`t see what the point of her living is. Life
Is hopeless for her. She gets an overdose && feels the
Rush of death.

.. Another wasted life.

The girl who seemed unbreakable--broke
The girl who seemed so strong--crumbled
The girl who always laughed it off--cried
The girl who would never stop trying--finally gave up

Have you ever felt so alone and nothing makes sense? Well that's how i feel right now i feel like i'm facing everything by myself, with nothing but tears and a fake smile.

I'm tired of being sad. I'm tired of crying. I'm tired of feeling empty inside. I'm tired of feeling worthless. I'm tired of feeling stuck. I'm tired of feeling crazy. I'm tired of being alone. I'm tired of yelling. I'm tired of pretending. I'm tired of dreaming of a life i will never have. I'm tired of missing things. I'm tired of missing people. I'm tired of remembering. I'm tired of wishing i could start all over. I'm tired of not being able to just let go. I'm tired of faking it. I'm tired of being different. I'm tired of being angry. I'm tired of needing help. I'm tired of always wondering when god is finally going to let me be happy. Most of all, i'm just i'm tired of being tired.